Well..it is almost Thursday morning, but I am valiantly holding on to the final hours of Wednesday! It is amazing how our busy lives can steal away precious moments of solitude and reflection. When my crazy life threatens to throw me from the saddle, I here the voice of my Heavenly Father say, Daughter, I am here. I am always here even when you become too busy for me. Don't let life steal you from me, but instead let me be the center of the gift I have given you. Oh! How I long for the moments when I can shut out the world, pray, and read my Bible; for it is then, I know that despite whatever daily struggles I experience, my God is with me every step of the way....especially when he is giving me a piggy back most of the time. It's okay...you can smile.
This thought caused me to remember a difficult time earlier this year. In October, I lost two uncles who were very precious to me. What made it harder...the deaths came nearly two weeks apart to the day. The most difficult part of it all, however, was the stark differences in 1. life and 2. death. My one uncle was relatively young, dying rather suddenly at the age of 65, while my other uncle died peacefully at the age of 92.
The loss of my 65 year old uncle was devastating The sorrow I felt threatened to consume me, but not from grief. Instead, I was filled with remorse and regret..for I had failed him...in a way I could never take back. I never, in my twenty years as a Christian, shared the Good News of Jesus Christ! My uncle knew where I stood regarding my faith, but it NEVER came up in conversation, and I NEVER sought or prayed for an opportunity to share! It's funny how you always think tomorrow will be there, but at some point for everyone..it never comes. As I stood beside his bedside, watching the machines breathe for him, I wept bitter tears. I prayed that God would still reach him, because if anyOne could...Jesus could! In my broken sobs, I told him that Jesus loves him and that it isn't too late. I begged him to hear me, and I begged him to let Jesus in...that Heaven was waiting for him...if..and only if.....He died the next morning. The machines were no longer able to force his body to do what it could no longer do...live.
The funeral was a sober affair as most of his family are not believers. The message was a good one, but as I looked around the funeral home, I could see it was falling on deaf ears. My family wanting God to go away..for He took their beloved husband, uncle, brother, and father away. I felt no love for God...only hate, sorrow, and most apparent...fear. Death has a way of forcing us to reflect on our mortality, and for unbelievers, it's the final peace of the journey. Oh! How I wanted to tell them it doesn't have to be final ....that life is ABUNDANT after death through Christ Jesus. But! Who was I to say anything when I had kept quiet for so long.
Three weeks later...I attended another funeral, but the experience was the exact opposite. My 92 year old uncle was an unabashedly bold follower of Christ who lived out his faith in EVERY part of his life. Not one person who met my uncle, left unaware of the joy that radiated through his spirit. When you saw my uncle, you saw the face of Jesus staring back at you. No judgement, only LOVE...whether it was family or new acquaintances. He died after a long, beautiful life...with his family by his side. He didn't die that night..he simply went HOME.
The funeral was a beautiful celebration of life both here on earth and the new life in Heaven. Don't get me wrong, there was plenty of crying. We are never ready to let our loved ones go, and the loss of his dynamic presence grieved every body in that church. However, we were blessed to hear the stories of his life shared by his children, his favorite songs sung by his granddaughters and myself, and memories recalled by other friends and family. His life made a difference, but not because of anything he did alone. But! It made a difference because he didn't do it alone...His life was a testimony of how God's abounding GRACE, LOVE, and MERCY are faithful through every trial, tribulation, and triumph.
As I think back to October, my heart still grieves for my very likely lost uncle, but at the same time, finds joy for the other. Nevertheless, God convicted me in a way I was NOT ready to admit or face. Although, I am not responsible for the choice my unbelieving uncle made, I was responsible for the choices I made. I failed him..no simple way to put it. But! I also know God does not want me to live the rest of my days beating myself up and living with regret. I still have faith that with God ALL things are possible...and that includes my uncle's salvation. However, I made a commitment the night he died to NEVER be so selfish as to withhold the BEST news out there. How could I do it? I let Satan convince me that I was not a strong enough believer to lead anyone to Christ. Who was I...someone who struggles with sin every day to tell anyone that they are dead without Christ. I believed his lies...and I made a costly mistake. I let fear, Satan's greatest tool, rule me...and I told God...no.....But! The story doesn't end there...as is always with Jesus!
I am pleading with you! Do not make the same mistake I did. I am no longer afraid to share the AWESOME POWER of God's love with everyone. Sure! Am I going to offend some, make some mad...yeah! But that means I am doing something right. Am I going to take a Bible and bash them over the heads...Uh NO! But, my actions and my words are the first place I can start. I want the words of my mouth to match the actions of my life....for it has been said "actions speak louder than words." Am I doing this in my own power..HECK NO! It is only through supernatural strength and courage that I face each day ready to battle for Christ, and that means battling for my friends and even strangers who are walking around dead. Remember! God does NOT hold you accountable for their actions, but He DOES hold you responsible for YOURS!
I am not pointing fingers...but I am pleading with you to reflect. I am not perfect, and I will NEVER dare to pretend that I come even close. I am still a sinner, but a sinner SAVED BY GRACE. I am a baby in my faith and learning EVERY DAY what Christ asks of me!
Jesus loves you more than you'll ever be able to comprehend...enough to have GIVEN his life for YOU! Let me end tonight with a quote I found today.
I couldn't have said it better myself!
God Bless!
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